So far in my writing for Fast Times, I have been spending the majority of my time focusing on the negative aspects of my life in Marin. Whether it was my lack of maturity or the blind acceptance of the judgments my father has been bestowing upon our sunny plot of California does not matter so much as the Marin I see now. The rich continue to rub elbows with the dusty poor despite the looks of disdain comically twisting the visages of the members of each of the opposing walks of life. I cannot argue with Mr. Bini who presents San Francisco and the surrounding area as overflowing with men and women desperately yearning to realize their visions of a utopia. Dreams being ever torn asunder by the violence and ineptitude marking just a couple of the many imperfections lancing through human nature. While the man who has spent the last twenty years instilling in me a strong sense of morality (which I must admit I sometimes wish I had never possessed) has passed many of these observations on in strings of select four letter words, the wisdom born from his experiences shines through: Marin County is its own peculiar institution of hybridized latent tolerance and class separation, the quintessential example of a society wanting to have its cake and eat it too.
Coexist, a simple command demanding universal acceptance and understanding, is one of the most ironic statements ever to make its way on to a bumper sticker due to the utopian ideals and impossibilities that make up its paradoxical nature. The concept of forging unanimity between all peoples regardless of race, sex or creed is both beautiful and dead on arrival. At the same time as a certain Marin based high school will preach diversity and love for fellow man, the same institution will jump through hoops to dissuade those of more exotic ideologies from even applying (I still remember Trevor), but this is mere hypocrisy amidst a far more subtle issue pervading the Bay Area. The Coexist movement, while grounded in tenets reaching for the greater good of mankind, is disappointingly synonymous with the lawless rule of absolute relativism where right and wrong are divined solely on the situation of the individual. Both concepts champion the shining light of living peacefully absent the verdicts placed by those of conflicting belief systems, yet simple philosophical thought swiftly betrays a common flaw. Coexist: tolerate everything, breathe harmony – absolute relativism: everything is relative to the individual, there is no all encompassing rule that applies to everybody. Do you see the crack marring what is an almost perfect rule of life?... The fact that they remain rules. Absolute relativism is an absolute rule that deigns to proclaim itself as something other than the very sin it rails against. In the same fashion, Coexist works for everyone except those for who believe coexistence is implicitly wrong not to mention others whose actions violate the inalienable rights of the vast majority of the population.
Perhaps there is a measure of cynicism to these observations, but there is an implicit flaw in the preaching of a concept whose most determined supporters will make comments following the same vein as those of the people they view as their most vehement enemies. To say these poor men and women are blind to their contradictory nature is a severe understatement as they manage to trap themselves in the mindset that everyone shares their newfound enlightenment. A friend who proudly displayed the blue and white of a freshly purchased Coexist bumper sticker was appalled when he learned that Marin Catholic High School required four years of theology classes stating he could not handle having “that stuff” shoved down his throat.
While he will remain nameless, this friend serves as a primary example of the controversial nature often overlooked in the most verbal of those petitioning for tolerance. That stuff specifically referred to teachings of my chosen religion at a school each student elected to attend over the public school system. In his assumptions that I did not want to learn about Catholicism and was being forced to study the sacraments and beatitudes he projected his personal beliefs on to me. In the same way, a superior, who will also remain anonymous for his or her own sake, told me of his or her refusal to shop at Forever 21 or eat at In-N-Out because they are cults shoving that same stuff down people’s throats. I must admit I have done zero research into either organization aside from the hours spent within their establishments; however, the eight characters on the bottom of their bags and cups: “John 3:16” direct the intellectually curious to a single verse from the Bible. Were these institutions secretly telling unsuspecting victims to drink the punch in the name of God I would happily boycott them, but demeaning them to the level of a cult is overkill. In my eyes, they are secular businesses being run by devout people not the spindly fingers of an invisible power seeking to dupe nonbelievers. I cannot escape the bias I experience in these situations due to my being a Catholic, yet at the same time as one of these people who will tolerate everybody will be repulsed by Christianity, they remain happily ignorant of the cheerful Buddha residing in any number of Chinese restaurants. For them, Coexist means living in harmony with everybody who thinks just like them, and because peace is so good, everybody must actually believe any bit of tripe that pours out of their mouths.
Again, the fact that Coexist is based in the firm belief that each member of humanity has every right to believe and think as they so choose is an ideology of exquisite beauty, yet the taint of the human ego muddies the waters of what was born in purity. Basking in the light of such utopian thought casts any and all opposition in darkness. To coexist is to live with people from all walks of life, excluding nobody and being a friend to anybody deserving of such attention. In the merchandizing of a truly noble concept, chivalry is murdered. The irony of defending the power of actions over that of words in a book is not lost upon me, but refraining from treating Coexist as a status symbol or novelty much like the countless T-shirts of the “Save Darfur” campaign, which seem to have found their way to the bottoms of dresser drawers everywhere, should be a higher priority. Wouldn’t the easiest way to spread tolerance and coexistence be to simply live one’s own life sans judgments and be at peace with one’s fellow man? Just do it. Stop being pretentious enough to think that everybody else needs your two cents and lead through your own deeds.
Marin County has given me everything I could possibly ask for. Living here opens up doors to every advantage a young adult can have. The deluge of diversity, precarious safety and boundless opportunities are a Godsend. Summer 2010 is speedily going into the history books as one of the best of my life because I have enjoyed Marin and California as much and as often as possible. I love my hometown, county and state deep to my core which is why the imperfections I observe garner such volatile responses. The utopia is an improbability but not an impossibility, and Marin is the forerunner in the rendering of that perfect world. The men and women who take their lives for granted and waste their time within the bubble are the bonds that shackle this place to its present state. Hypocrisy and demagoguery are a potent combination made even more subversive in their being blended with the ideals of honest causes.
Remember that I talk about the place that is responsible for who I am today. Recall I took my first steps here. Do not forget that Marin is my home. I pray we continue to move in the right direction. Let us step away from the mistake that is Coexist and coexist so that we may live together in a world of mutual respect and happy understanding.
